Pleasure From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
For other uses, see Pleasure (disambiguation).
"Pleasant" redirects here. For other uses, see Pleasant (disambiguation).
Comic mask on the façade of the Royal Dramatic Theatre in Stockholm
Weekend pleasure in France
Gentlemen's Pleasures by Adolphe-Alexandre Lesrel, 1885
Pleasure describes the broad class of mental states that humans and other animals experience as positive, enjoyable, or worth seeking. It includes more specific mental states such as happiness, entertainment, enjoyment,ecstasy, and euphoria. In psychology, the pleasure principle describes pleasure as a positive feedback mechanism, motivating the organism to recreate in the future the situation which it has just found pleasurable. According to this theory, organisms are similarly motivated to avoid situations that have caused pain in the past.[citation needed]
The experience of pleasure is subjective and different individuals will experience different kinds and amounts of pleasure in the same situation. Many pleasurable experiences are associated with satisfying basic biological drives, such as eating, exercise, hygiene, sex or defecation. Other pleasurable experiences are associated with social experiences and social drives, such as the experiences of accomplishment, recognition, and service. The appreciation of cultural artifacts and activities such as art, music, dancing, and literature is often pleasurable.
In recent years, significant progress has been made in understanding the brain mechanisms underlying pleasure. One of the key discoveries was made by Kent C. Berridge who has shown that pleasure is not a unitary experience. Rather, pleasure consists of multiple brain processes including liking, wanting and learning subserved by distinct yet partially overlapping brain networks. In particular, this research has been helped by the use of objective pleasure-elicited reactions in humans and other animals such as the behavioral ‘liking’/‘disliking’ facial expressions to tastes that are homologous between humans and many other mammals.
Recreational drug use can be pleasurable: some drugs, illicit and otherwise, directly create euphoria in the human brain when ingested. The mind's natural tendency to seek out more of this feeling (as described by the pleasure principle) can lead to dependence and addiction. Berridge and Robinson have proposed that addiction results from drugs hijacking the ‘wanting’ system through a sensitization of the mesolimbic dopamine system.
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Neurobiology
The pleasure center is the set of brain structures, predominantly the nucleus accumbens, theorized to produce great pleasure when stimulated electrically. Some references state that the septum pellucidium is generally considered to be the pleasure center, while others mention the hypothalamus when referring to the pleasure center for intracranial stimulation.[6] Certain chemicals are known to stimulate the pleasure centers of the brain. It has been suggested that physical exertion can release endorphines in what is called the runner's high, and equally it has been found that chocolate and certain spices, such as from the family of the chilli, can release or cause to be released similar psychoactive chemicals to those released during sexual acts.
Psychology[edit]How pleasureable something or someone is experienced as not only depends on the objective attributes (appearance, sound, taste, texture, etc.), but on beliefs about its history, circumstances of creation, rarity, fame, or price, and other non-intrinsic attributes such as the social status or identity it conveys. For example, a sweater worn by a celebrity is more desired than an otherwise identical sweater that has not, but considerably less so if it has been washed.[7] Another example was when Grammy-winning, internationally-acclaimed violinist Joshua Bell played in the Washington D.C. subway for 43 minutes, attracting little attention from the 1,097 people who passed by, and earning about $59 in tips.[7][8][9] Paul Bloom describes these phenomena as arising from a form of essentialism.
Some people find things pleasurable which have adverse objective attributes, such as horror films and spicy food.
Philosophical views
Part of a series onHedonism Thinkers[show]
Schools of hedonism[show]
Key concepts
Aponia · Ataraxia · Eudaimonia ·Happiness · Hedone · Pain ·Pleasure · Sensation · Suffering ·Tetrapharmakos
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Epicurus and his followers defined the highest pleasure as the absence of suffering and pleasure itself as "freedom from pain in the body and freedom from turmoil in the soul". According to Cicero (or rather his character Torquatus) Epicurus also believed that pleasure was the chief good and pain the chief evil.
In the 12th century Razi's "Treatise of the Self and the Spirit" (Kitab al Nafs Wa’l Ruh) analyzed different types of pleasure, sensuous and intellectual, and explained their relations with one another. He concludes that human needs and desires are endless, and "their satisfaction is by definition impossible."
The 19th-century German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer understood pleasure as a negative sensation, one that negates the usual existential condition of suffering.
Philosophies of pleasure
Utilitarianism and Hedonism are philosophies that advocate increasing to the maximum the amount of pleasure and minimizing the amount of suffering.
As a uniquely human experience See also: Reward system § Animals vs humans and Animal sexual behaviour § Sex for pleasure
There has been debate as to whether pleasure is experienced by other animals rather than being an exclusive property of humankind. Jeremy Bentham (usually regarded as the founder of Utilitarianism)[15] and Beth Dixon[16]both argue that animals do experience pleasure — the latter, however, in a carefully worded manner. People who believe in human exceptionalism might argue that it is a form of anthropomorphism to ascribe any human experience to animals, including pleasure. Others view animal behaviour simply as responses to stimuli; this is the way behaviourists look at the evidence, Pavlov's dogs (or rather his explanation of their behaviour) being the best-known example. However, it may be argued that we simply cannot know whether animals experience pleasure, and most scientists, indeed, prefer to remain neutral while using anthropomorphisms as and when they need them. It appears, though, that those who recognise emotions in other animals are in the ascent: many ethologists, for example Marc Bekoff, are prepared to draw the conclusion that animals do experience emotions, though these are not necessarily the same as human emotions.
Part of a series on UtilitarianismPredecessors[show]
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Wikiquote has quotations related to: PleasureLook up pleasure in Wiktionary, the free dictionary.
Hedonism From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
For other uses, see Hedonism (disambiguation).
Part of a series onHedonismThinkers[show]
Schools of hedonism[show]
Key concepts[show]
Related articles[show]
Hedonism is a school of thought that argues that pleasure is the primary or most important intrinsic good. In very simple terms, a hedonist strives to maximize net pleasure (pleasure minus pain).
Ethical hedonism is the idea that all people have the right to do everything in their power to achieve the greatest amount of pleasure possible to them, assuming that their actions do not infringe on the equal rights of others. It is also the idea that every person's pleasure should far surpass their amount of pain. Ethical hedonism is said to have been started by Aristippus of Cyrene, a student of Socrates. He held the idea that pleasure is the highest good.
10 Benefits of Sleeping Naked You Probably Didn’t Know
HEALTH LIFESTYLE BY JOSEPH HINDY
Sleeping is one of the most important things we do every night. Getting the right amount of sleep has an untold number of health benefits and not getting enough sleep is a serious problem in many countries around the world. Did you know that you can get additional benefits by sleeping naked? Here are some benefits of sleeping in the nude:
1. It is easier.When you don’t have to worry about sleeping in clothes, things start to get easier. You don’t have to buy pajamas, which can save you money. You have less clothes to wash and less clothes to put away. You may have to clean your bed sheets more often, but not nearly as often as you’d have to wash your pajamas when you run out.
2. It forces you to be ready to go more often.Some people get off of work, change into their pajamas, and use this as an excuse to stay home the rest of the evening. This can lead to a moresedentary lifestyle, which has been attributed to things like weight gain. When you keep your regular clothes on, you tend to go out more often and that’s a good thing.
3. It can make you feel happier and more free.Just imagine the feeling of laying in bed naked. You’re free of your pants and underwear. Women, you’re not wearing a constrictive bra. It’s just you sandwiched between two cool sheets. The feeling just makes you want to smile and it makes you feel more free. Everyone can use that kind of good feeling every now and then, and it may even help you be happier as a person.
4. Skin-on-skin contact is the best.If you’re married, or living with your significant other, sleeping naked gives a greater chance of skin-on-skin contact, especially when it comes to cuddling. This kind of contact can also lead to a more active sex life. All of this releases copious amounts of oxytocin, which is the neurotransmitter that helps you feel those good feelings about your significant other.
5. It could lead to better sleep.Let’s revisit the scenario I described above. There are no drawstrings or clothes getting tangled in sheets. You don’t have to worry about shirts getting twisted. All of these distractions go away when you sleep naked and it may help you get better, deeper sleep. You don’t need science to tell you that better, deeper sleep only helps you be healthier.
6. It can help your skin.For once your body gets to breathe. Your private parts, armpits, and feet are generally restricted all day and are often covered by multiple layers, even in the summer time. Give those parts a chance to air out and breathe. This canlower the risk of skin diseases, like athlete’s foot, that result from wet, restricted skin.
7. Helps you regulate your cortisol.Cortisol is a very strange chemical in the body but it can do a lot of damage. When you sleep naked, it helps keep your body temperature at the optimal ranges so your body can better create cortisol. If you sleep overheated your cortisol levels tend to stay high, even after you wake up. This can lead to increased anxiety, cravings for bad food, weight gain, and more terrible things. Sleep naked so you can keep your body temperature down and sleep well so your body can properly produce and regulate cortisol.
8. Balances your melatonin and growth hormone.Continuing along that same vein, keeping your sleeping environment below 70 degrees (F) every night can help your body regulate its melatonin and growth hormone levels. These chemicals help the body do things like prevent aging and are essential to good health. When you sleep in clothes, your body heats up and prevents effective use of these hormones. In other words, sleeping with clothes on makes you grow old faster.
9. It can keep your sex organs happier.For men, the cooler sleeping conditions allows your testes to remain at a cooler temperature. This helps keep your sperm healthy and your reproductive systems functioning as normal. For women, the cooler and more airy sleeping conditions can actually help prevent yeast infections. Yeast grows better in warm, moist conditions. When it’s cooler and dryer, the growth of yeast is prevented.
10. Sleeping in the summer is more bearable.Summertime is a tricky time to get good sleep. If you don’t have air conditioning, then you may find your bedroom a bit stuffy at night. Shedding those bedtime clothes can help the bedroom feel more comfortable. You may even be able to turn the A/C off on those cooler nights, which can save you a few bucks on your electricity bill. Don’t wake up drenched in sweat again because your thermostat is downstairs and the hot air expands up to your bedroom where the thermostat can’t read the warm temperatures.
With these tips in mind, it’s time to start taking off your clothes at night! Of course, there are times where clothes are preferable. If you are ill or it’s cold outside, then you should sleep with clothes on to help you stay warm and prevent further illness. Otherwise, go commando!
8 Reasons You Should Be Naked More Often
By: Kate Fridkis / April 9, 2012
Recently, I ended up naked in front of a full-length mirror. It was an accident. Seriously, it was. I don’t walk around naked that much. Anyway, there I was, naked, in front of this mirror. And for some reason, I took a long moment, just to look. And it was weird. Because it occurred to me that I never do that. Which I guess is actually pretty normal. But the weird part was that I didn’t really know my own naked body. It was vaguely familiar, of course. I mean, I do take showers and stuff. But I almost never pay attention to it, except to give it some unhelpful critique or be surprised by how chubby it’s gotten in certain places. Actually, ever since I gained some weight, I’ve wanted to be naked even less. Especially when there’s no immediate sex involved. Standing in front of the mirror, I had a small epiphany. I should get to know my naked body. I should get good at being naked. Actually, everyone should. If I was a dictator, I’d mandate daily naked time. And free healthcare for all! And cake! But mostly naked time. Why? Here are some reasons…
1. This is you. Under all those clothes, this the way you actually look. The rest is a disguise. Isn’t it weird not to know your own naked body? It’s kind of weird. Sometimes I feel like I’m mostly a brain, and then there’s this body attached. This body that inevitably looks disproportionate in photos. This body that decided to get abruptly curvy recently, but which had before been kind of bony. My body seems less a wonderland, as John Mayer might sing, and more a mysterious wilderness that occasionally sprouts a strangely placed hair like a flag, thus declaring its eternal independence. But no matter how separate from your body you feel, you are your body. And it is you. You’re this weird body/brain combination—like some hybrid alien creature– no, like a person. So you should get to know yourself. Naked.
2. It’s more fun. I have been known to feel a little awkward about being naked. Like, sometimes if someone else is around but for some reason I have to change, I do that squirmy-inside-the-clothes dance that usually results in either a new outfit or me falling on my face in the locker room at the gym. But how much more fun is life when you feel good about being naked? A lot, I’m willing to bet. Not that you have to whip everything off in front of some strangers, but it’s better not to have to worry about them seeing something unflattering. How much more fun is it to feel like your naked body is flattering? SO MUCH MORE FUN.
3. Sex. This is a big one. And it’s better when you like the way you look naked, when you know what you look like naked, and so it’s not shocking, and when you are comfortable being naked. Otherwise, it can be really, really awkward. It can be “please just turn off the light before I take this robe off” awkward. It can be “wait, do you have a flashlight so I can find my way back to my robe” afterwards awkward. I hope it’s never that awkward.. But sex can definitely get pretty un-amazing when you’re worried about your body. And your body definitely has to be (at least relatively) naked for sex. For amazing sex, body confidence is an absolute necessity. And I’m assuming we all want to have amazing sex? Right? OK, good.
4. Clothes. The better you feel naked, the better you’ll feel in clothes. Because clothes won’t just be about hiding things, they’ll be about celebrating things. I want my clothes to be a celebration. Is that asking too much of them? I think not!
5. Because it’s there. Like Everest. But a lot less dangerous and snowy. I mean, mine isn’t snowy. If yours is, that’s totally fine. Our bodies are challenging, though. They’re complicated and disobedient and sometimes they feel like they need to be tamed. Sometimes they are an obstacle that needs to be overcome. Climbed, if you will. Like Mount Everest. Or maybe they just need to be appreciated more. That’s what I really think. So a little less like Mount Everest and a little more like a puppy. It just needs attention! Give it love and attention and it will reward you with feelings of happiness and comfort. And sex appeal.
6. Your body “flaws” won’t be as shocking. I was shocked to notice that I have back fat. It must have crept up on me. The other day I was typing on my laptop in a towel, right after showering, and I leaned back in my chair and caught a glimpse of my back in the upright mirror by the table. Oh, the horror that awaited me there! Was that a ROLL? As in, a cinnamon roll or some other doughy pastry? On my back? Why, God, why? Because that’s what happens when you’re not really skinny and you have skin on your back, apparently. It would not have been so shocking if I typed in the (partial) nude more often. Or just knew my naked body better. Then I would’ve been like, “Yep. Back fat. It’s a fact.” That reminds me—I’m totally craving a cinnamon roll. Those things are good.
7. You’ll know your real sizes. My boobs are generally a lie. I’m wearing a padded bra all the time. When I’d just started dating my husband, I had this horrible realization that the first time he saw me without a bra, he might be … underwhelmed. Or downright offended. “False advertising!” He was fine, but it made me think about the dramatic difference between my clothed and naked boobs, and I wondered why I was afraid of having breasts that were, um, the actual size of my breasts. Why am I afraid of that? Maybe in part it’s because I’m so unused to it. The unknown is scary. But my boobs don’t have to be unknown. I just have to take off my bra, and there they are. Like magic.
8. You’ll feel more comfortable in general. If you can walk aroundyour apartment naked and happy, walking across a room in clothes is probably a piece of cake. If you can eat a piece of cake naked and happy (this might be my ultimate goal, in life), then you can definitely do anything. Liking yourself naked is liking yourself exposed, flawed, complicated, and undone. If you can like yourself like that, you can face the world proud and naked! Or just proud. With the confidence of a confident naked person.
So … do it! Stand naked in front of a mirror for a while. Do this more than once. Try walking around naked. Possibly eating cake. Have sex with the lights on, and take time to admire your own body in action. This is not totally self-absorbed, it’s healthy and good for everyone. You could even try naked yoga. I have not gone that far, but it doesn’t mean you can’t surpass me. Go ahead, I dare you, surpass me!
Kate Fridkis is a Brooklyn-based columnist, freelance writer, and bagel enthusiast who writes the blog Eat the Damn Cake. You can follow her on Twitter at @eatthedamncake.
Tags: body image, naked, nudity, top 10
Nudity Is Healthy for Brains and Bodies
Hank PellissierBy Hank Pellissier
Ethical Technology
Posted: Mar 14, 2012
Is clothing crushing us? Are we trapped in tomb-like textiles, exiling our flesh from experiencing the environment? Are we atrophying our epidermis, our senses, our neuro-intelligence?
If you put a plaster cast on a broken arm the skin starves for Vitamin D, the muscles weaken due to strangled range of motion, the nerve synapses depress to a whimper of their former joy. Twenty-first century hominids? We shroud our entire skin palette except for face, neck and hands - we obliterate symbiosis with the planet.
We hide in cocoons, when we could be free as butterflies.
History reveals many cultures that were not clothes-minded. Spartans were basically bare and their victories in pan-Hellenic sports competitions enticed all neighboring Greeks to exercise nude, creating the word “gymnasium” (Greek gymnos = naked). Romans mingled in magnificent bathhouses, enjoying dense communal nudity as they drank, dined, defecated, bathed, read books, argued politics, and watched theater. Adamists — naked heretics — performed stripped-down church services in North Africa, Bohemia, the Netherlands, and England. Pre-Hitler Germans were avid adherents ofFreikorperkultur (“Free Body Culture”) with 70,000 attending co-ed Nacktkultur schools.
There’s naked Japanese in hot springs, naked Finns in saunas, “sky-clad” Jain monks in India, plus millions of nudists worldwide going to “Nakation” camps, beaches, and resorts. They’re still sporty as Spartans, eager to hike naked (“free bush rambling”), canoe naked (“canuding”), bicycle naked, ride horses naked, run naked, play volleyball, badminton, ping-pong and chess naked, swim naked, dance naked, do Naked Yoga, Naked Tai Chi, Naked Gardening, Naked Bowling, and of course, many of us, perhaps you and I, dear readers, are NIFOC — Naked In Front of Computers.
Many famous figures were bare-all aficionados; too many politicians to name, so I’ll just list sci-fi and scientists: Leonard Nimoy, Alexander Graham Bell, Robert Heinlein, and seismologist Charles Richter. Nudism is prominent in Philip Jose Farmer’s Riverworld books and John Varley’s Steel Beach. Celebrities? Many movie stars skinny-dip at the French Riviera, trying to elude paparazzi seeking pix of Bruce WIllis’willy or Natalie Portman’s port side.
Here’s evidence suggesting that skin-only can be superior:
Born Free. Pediatricians agree that infants thrive with a daily dose of “naked time” because the unhampered range of motion aids brain development, stimulating neuron growth. Recent discoveries reveal that the “plastic” brain changes and develops throughout our entire lives. Neuroplasticity pioneer Michael M. Merzenich believes, “Everything that you can see happen in a young brain can happen in an older brain.” Doesn’t this imply that “naked time” is equally valuable for humans of any age, especially the elderly?
Weakened Bodies. A 2003 University of Reading study entitled “A Naked Ape Would Have Fewer Parasites” posits that “humans evolved hairlessness to reduce parasite loads, especially ectoparasites that may carry disease.” Unfortunately, the garments we wear can be a breeding ground for filthy fungi and bad bacterium, causing yeast infections, urinary tract infections, rotting toenails. Lyme Disease deer ticks can grab onto our sweaters and sea licecan sneak into our bathing suit crotches. Cinched-up belts, ties, and clothes impede breathing. Men’s snug pants raise testicle temperature, lowering sperm count and fertility.
Barefoot Medicine. Going shoeless is now recognized as an anti-Alzheimer’s, brain-boosting activity because the sole sensation entices your brain into growing extra, efficient neuron connections. Dr. Norman Doidge (author of The Brain That Changes Itself) believes skipping shoes increases brain flexibility and youthfulness, and many podiatrists now advise going barefoot as much as possible. Bare feet are today’s prescription. Will tomorrow’s elixir take the next step: Bare Body?
Superior Socialization. Self-actualization proponent Abraham Maslow believed “Nudism… is itself a kind of therapy.” Health benefits of social nudity include stress reduction, satiation of curiosity about the human body, reduction of porn addiction, a sense of full-body integration and developing a wholesome attitude about the opposite gender. Research at the University of Northern Iowa discovered that nudists have significantly higher body self-acceptance. Another study concluded that teens at a New York nudist camp were “extraordinarily well-adjusted, happy, and thoughtful.” It’s also excellent for children to grow up free of shame about the human body.
Tolerant Views.A University of Central Florida 2008 study of 384 participants concluded that pro-nudity students “were significantly more accepting of other religious groups and gays and lesbians” when compared to the anti-nudity students. They were also “less prejudiced towards ethnically dissimilar others.”
Soothe Away Your Crazies. Massage is recognized as a therapeutic treatment for mental health issues like depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, bipolarism, borderline personality disorder, learning difficulties, and low self-esteem. The skin stimulation of massage — improving blood flow and detoxifying the lymph system — is duplicated by the warmth, freedom, and improved circulation generated in nakedness.
Soak Up The Rays Vitamin D deficiency is currently soaring, with up to 75% of USA teens and adults receiving insufficient amounts of the “sunshine vitamin.” Lack of this essential health aid is a factor in numerous ailments, including cancer, heart disease, osteoporosis and diabetes. Anyone who bares all outside as a “naturist” harvests larger amounts of Vitamin D in a quicker time span.
Financial Liberation. Clothes are a huge money and time-suck with shopping, laundry, closets, dressers, and gazillions of hours wasted wondering what so-and-so looks like with their garments removed. The global markets for swimsuits alone is expected to reach $17.6 billion annually by 2015; our carbon footprint would shrink like a wool sweater if fabric was no longer manufactured.
Longevity (just joking!). Have you noticed that the furry Norway Rat only lives 2-3 years, while the Naked Mole Rat survives to be 28?
So… is the future going to be full frontal? Will the post-Singularity planet be stripped? Will everyone in a climate-controlled tomorrow choose to be nude, strutting around like the Nuba dancers and boxers of Leni Reifenstahl?
Trends point to an era where there won’t be a stitch to worry about. Many resort areas are are now offering nudism to increase tourism, and American naturist clubs claim their enrollment is growing 20% annually. The German airline OssiUrlaub.de offered nude chartered flights to a Baltic sea resort, and today’s lengthy luggage searches at airports are steering travelers to destinations where they only need carry-on towels and sunblock. Twenty million Europeans already go to nude beaches and spas.
Getting goosebumps imagining it, are you?
A REAL PLEASURE
The relationship between health and sexual competence
Sexual and reproductive health
Sexual Health & Improving Sexual Relationships
Guidelines for Female Pleasure, Eroticism, and Orgasm
20 ways to empower the woman (and her partner) to value female desire
Post published by Barry W McCarthy Ph.D. on Jan 15, 2013 in What's Your Sexual Style?
There is more written about orgasm than any other area of female sexuality. The good news is that awareness of the woman's "sexual voice" which includes desire, pleasure, eroticism, and satisfaction is healthy for the woman, the couple, and the culture. The bad news is that sexual performance demands, specifically viewing orgasm as a pass-fail test, increases self -consciousness and reduces sexual desire.
The following guidelines empower the woman (and her partner) to value female desire and satisfaction. Orgasm is integral to the pleasuring/eroticism process. This approach confronts the performance pressure of orgasm as the pass-fail sex test.
1. A female is responsible for her desire, pleasure, eroticism, and orgasm. Developing a unique sexual voice is a woman's challenge. It is not the man's responsibility to "give her an orgasm".
2. Together you develop an intimate, interactive couple sexual style which facilitates desire, pleasure, eroticism, orgasm, and satisfaction.
3. Receptivity and responsivity to pleasurable and erotic touch facilitates arousal and orgasm.
4. Arousal involves both subjective components (feeling sexy and turned-on) and objective components (vaginal lubrication and being physically receptive to intercourse).
5. "Foreplay"-where the man stimulates the woman to get her ready for intercourse-increases self-consciousness and performance anxiety. The experience of "pleasuring"- which emphasizes mutuality and sharing-facilitates desire and orgasm.
6. Pleasuring and eroticism often lead to intercourse, but intercourse is not the test of sexuality nor is intercourse necessary for a satisfying sexual experience. A key concept is to transition to intercourse at high levels of erotic flow.
7. You can develop your unique "sexual voice"-being aware of what facilitates and what subverts healthy sexuality. Take an active role in verbally and non-verbally making requests and guiding your partner.
8. The prescription for satisfying sexuality is intimacy, pleasuring, and eroticism. Traditionally, female sexual socialization has underplayed eroticism. Eroticism is integral to orgasm and satisfaction.
9. Be aware of your preferences-pleasure-recipient vs. mutual stimulation; focused vs. multiple stimulation; when and how to transition from sensual to erotic stimulation; emotional and physical conditions for a vital and satisfying couple sexuality.
10. You cannot say "yes" to healthy sexuality unless you have the right to say "no" to sex. You are free to initiate the transition from pleasuring to intercourse and to guide intromission.
11. Women who prefer multiple stimulation during pleasuring/eroticism usually prefer multiple stimulation during intercourse. You can utilize clitoral stimulation with his or your fingers, request breast or buttock stimulation, enjoy erotic fantasies, and/or switch intercourse positions.
12. Many women hope to use pro-sexual medications when they become available to enhance sexual desire and orgasm. Medication can be a valuable resource, but it is not a stand-alone "magic pill". The pro-sex medication needs to be integrated into your couple sexual style of intimacy, pleasure, and eroticism.
13. Many women, especially after 40, use some form of additional lubrication (usually estrogen or water-based). This facilitates intercourse, but is not a substitute for subjective arousal.
14. Only 1 in 4 women experience the male pattern of one orgasm during intercourse without using additional stimulation. Female sexual response and orgasm is more flexible, variable, and individualistic than male sexual response. You may be non-orgasmic, singly orgasmic, or multi-orgasmic which might occur during pleasuring, intercourse, or afterplay, depending on your unique pattern and preferences. Female sexual response is more variable and flexible-different, not better or worse-than male sexual response.
15. Develop comfort with your desire, pleasure, eroticism, orgasm pattern. Sexuality is about experiencing and sharing pleasure, it is not a performance to have a "G" spot orgasm, multiple orgasms, a "vaginal" orgasm, extended orgasm, or whatever is the new performance fad.
16. Orgasm is a three to ten second experience. Orgasm is a natural result of subjective arousal, erotic flow, and giving yourself permission to enjoy the orgasmic experience.
17. The distinction between "clitoral" and "vaginal" orgasm is not scientifically valid. Whether orgasm occurs with manual, oral, rubbing, intercourse, self, or vibrator stimulation, the physiological response is very similar although the subjective experience of satisfaction varies depending on expectations and preferences.
18. It is unrealistic to expect orgasm during each sexual experience; you are not a sexual machine. Female sexuality is more variable and flexible than male sexuality. On average, women are orgasmic during 70 per cent of sexual encounters. Satisfaction involves orgasm, but is much more than orgasm.
19. Orgasm is integral to female sexuality. Desire and satisfaction are more important than orgasm. You are free to make requests of your partner (prolonged pleasuring, your pace of arousal, multiple stimulation, preferred erotic scenarios, vibrator stimulation, cunnilingus to orgasm, clitoral stimulation during intercourse) to enhance pleasure, eroticism, and orgasm.
20. Remember, sexuality is not about proving anything to yourself, your partner, or anyone else. Sexuality is about sharing desire, pleasure, eroticism, orgasm, and satisfaction.
For other uses, see Pleasure (disambiguation).
"Pleasant" redirects here. For other uses, see Pleasant (disambiguation).
Comic mask on the façade of the Royal Dramatic Theatre in Stockholm
Weekend pleasure in France
Gentlemen's Pleasures by Adolphe-Alexandre Lesrel, 1885
Pleasure describes the broad class of mental states that humans and other animals experience as positive, enjoyable, or worth seeking. It includes more specific mental states such as happiness, entertainment, enjoyment,ecstasy, and euphoria. In psychology, the pleasure principle describes pleasure as a positive feedback mechanism, motivating the organism to recreate in the future the situation which it has just found pleasurable. According to this theory, organisms are similarly motivated to avoid situations that have caused pain in the past.[citation needed]
The experience of pleasure is subjective and different individuals will experience different kinds and amounts of pleasure in the same situation. Many pleasurable experiences are associated with satisfying basic biological drives, such as eating, exercise, hygiene, sex or defecation. Other pleasurable experiences are associated with social experiences and social drives, such as the experiences of accomplishment, recognition, and service. The appreciation of cultural artifacts and activities such as art, music, dancing, and literature is often pleasurable.
In recent years, significant progress has been made in understanding the brain mechanisms underlying pleasure. One of the key discoveries was made by Kent C. Berridge who has shown that pleasure is not a unitary experience. Rather, pleasure consists of multiple brain processes including liking, wanting and learning subserved by distinct yet partially overlapping brain networks. In particular, this research has been helped by the use of objective pleasure-elicited reactions in humans and other animals such as the behavioral ‘liking’/‘disliking’ facial expressions to tastes that are homologous between humans and many other mammals.
Recreational drug use can be pleasurable: some drugs, illicit and otherwise, directly create euphoria in the human brain when ingested. The mind's natural tendency to seek out more of this feeling (as described by the pleasure principle) can lead to dependence and addiction. Berridge and Robinson have proposed that addiction results from drugs hijacking the ‘wanting’ system through a sensitization of the mesolimbic dopamine system.
Contents
- 1 Neurobiology
- 2 Psychology
- 3 Philosophical views
- 4 As a uniquely human experience
- 5 See also
- 6 References
- 7 Further reading
Neurobiology
The pleasure center is the set of brain structures, predominantly the nucleus accumbens, theorized to produce great pleasure when stimulated electrically. Some references state that the septum pellucidium is generally considered to be the pleasure center, while others mention the hypothalamus when referring to the pleasure center for intracranial stimulation.[6] Certain chemicals are known to stimulate the pleasure centers of the brain. It has been suggested that physical exertion can release endorphines in what is called the runner's high, and equally it has been found that chocolate and certain spices, such as from the family of the chilli, can release or cause to be released similar psychoactive chemicals to those released during sexual acts.
Psychology[edit]How pleasureable something or someone is experienced as not only depends on the objective attributes (appearance, sound, taste, texture, etc.), but on beliefs about its history, circumstances of creation, rarity, fame, or price, and other non-intrinsic attributes such as the social status or identity it conveys. For example, a sweater worn by a celebrity is more desired than an otherwise identical sweater that has not, but considerably less so if it has been washed.[7] Another example was when Grammy-winning, internationally-acclaimed violinist Joshua Bell played in the Washington D.C. subway for 43 minutes, attracting little attention from the 1,097 people who passed by, and earning about $59 in tips.[7][8][9] Paul Bloom describes these phenomena as arising from a form of essentialism.
Some people find things pleasurable which have adverse objective attributes, such as horror films and spicy food.
Philosophical views
Part of a series onHedonism Thinkers[show]
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Key concepts
Aponia · Ataraxia · Eudaimonia ·Happiness · Hedone · Pain ·Pleasure · Sensation · Suffering ·Tetrapharmakos
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Epicurus and his followers defined the highest pleasure as the absence of suffering and pleasure itself as "freedom from pain in the body and freedom from turmoil in the soul". According to Cicero (or rather his character Torquatus) Epicurus also believed that pleasure was the chief good and pain the chief evil.
In the 12th century Razi's "Treatise of the Self and the Spirit" (Kitab al Nafs Wa’l Ruh) analyzed different types of pleasure, sensuous and intellectual, and explained their relations with one another. He concludes that human needs and desires are endless, and "their satisfaction is by definition impossible."
The 19th-century German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer understood pleasure as a negative sensation, one that negates the usual existential condition of suffering.
Philosophies of pleasure
Utilitarianism and Hedonism are philosophies that advocate increasing to the maximum the amount of pleasure and minimizing the amount of suffering.
As a uniquely human experience See also: Reward system § Animals vs humans and Animal sexual behaviour § Sex for pleasure
There has been debate as to whether pleasure is experienced by other animals rather than being an exclusive property of humankind. Jeremy Bentham (usually regarded as the founder of Utilitarianism)[15] and Beth Dixon[16]both argue that animals do experience pleasure — the latter, however, in a carefully worded manner. People who believe in human exceptionalism might argue that it is a form of anthropomorphism to ascribe any human experience to animals, including pleasure. Others view animal behaviour simply as responses to stimuli; this is the way behaviourists look at the evidence, Pavlov's dogs (or rather his explanation of their behaviour) being the best-known example. However, it may be argued that we simply cannot know whether animals experience pleasure, and most scientists, indeed, prefer to remain neutral while using anthropomorphisms as and when they need them. It appears, though, that those who recognise emotions in other animals are in the ascent: many ethologists, for example Marc Bekoff, are prepared to draw the conclusion that animals do experience emotions, though these are not necessarily the same as human emotions.
Part of a series on UtilitarianismPredecessors[show]
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Wikiquote has quotations related to: PleasureLook up pleasure in Wiktionary, the free dictionary.
- False pleasure
- Felicific calculus, an attempt to calculate pleasure
- Flow (psychology)
- Gratification
- Hedonism
- Leisure
- Orgasm
- Paradox of hedonism
- Sadomasochism
Hedonism From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
For other uses, see Hedonism (disambiguation).
Part of a series onHedonismThinkers[show]
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Hedonism is a school of thought that argues that pleasure is the primary or most important intrinsic good. In very simple terms, a hedonist strives to maximize net pleasure (pleasure minus pain).
Ethical hedonism is the idea that all people have the right to do everything in their power to achieve the greatest amount of pleasure possible to them, assuming that their actions do not infringe on the equal rights of others. It is also the idea that every person's pleasure should far surpass their amount of pain. Ethical hedonism is said to have been started by Aristippus of Cyrene, a student of Socrates. He held the idea that pleasure is the highest good.
10 Benefits of Sleeping Naked You Probably Didn’t Know
HEALTH LIFESTYLE BY JOSEPH HINDY
Sleeping is one of the most important things we do every night. Getting the right amount of sleep has an untold number of health benefits and not getting enough sleep is a serious problem in many countries around the world. Did you know that you can get additional benefits by sleeping naked? Here are some benefits of sleeping in the nude:
1. It is easier.When you don’t have to worry about sleeping in clothes, things start to get easier. You don’t have to buy pajamas, which can save you money. You have less clothes to wash and less clothes to put away. You may have to clean your bed sheets more often, but not nearly as often as you’d have to wash your pajamas when you run out.
2. It forces you to be ready to go more often.Some people get off of work, change into their pajamas, and use this as an excuse to stay home the rest of the evening. This can lead to a moresedentary lifestyle, which has been attributed to things like weight gain. When you keep your regular clothes on, you tend to go out more often and that’s a good thing.
3. It can make you feel happier and more free.Just imagine the feeling of laying in bed naked. You’re free of your pants and underwear. Women, you’re not wearing a constrictive bra. It’s just you sandwiched between two cool sheets. The feeling just makes you want to smile and it makes you feel more free. Everyone can use that kind of good feeling every now and then, and it may even help you be happier as a person.
4. Skin-on-skin contact is the best.If you’re married, or living with your significant other, sleeping naked gives a greater chance of skin-on-skin contact, especially when it comes to cuddling. This kind of contact can also lead to a more active sex life. All of this releases copious amounts of oxytocin, which is the neurotransmitter that helps you feel those good feelings about your significant other.
5. It could lead to better sleep.Let’s revisit the scenario I described above. There are no drawstrings or clothes getting tangled in sheets. You don’t have to worry about shirts getting twisted. All of these distractions go away when you sleep naked and it may help you get better, deeper sleep. You don’t need science to tell you that better, deeper sleep only helps you be healthier.
6. It can help your skin.For once your body gets to breathe. Your private parts, armpits, and feet are generally restricted all day and are often covered by multiple layers, even in the summer time. Give those parts a chance to air out and breathe. This canlower the risk of skin diseases, like athlete’s foot, that result from wet, restricted skin.
7. Helps you regulate your cortisol.Cortisol is a very strange chemical in the body but it can do a lot of damage. When you sleep naked, it helps keep your body temperature at the optimal ranges so your body can better create cortisol. If you sleep overheated your cortisol levels tend to stay high, even after you wake up. This can lead to increased anxiety, cravings for bad food, weight gain, and more terrible things. Sleep naked so you can keep your body temperature down and sleep well so your body can properly produce and regulate cortisol.
8. Balances your melatonin and growth hormone.Continuing along that same vein, keeping your sleeping environment below 70 degrees (F) every night can help your body regulate its melatonin and growth hormone levels. These chemicals help the body do things like prevent aging and are essential to good health. When you sleep in clothes, your body heats up and prevents effective use of these hormones. In other words, sleeping with clothes on makes you grow old faster.
9. It can keep your sex organs happier.For men, the cooler sleeping conditions allows your testes to remain at a cooler temperature. This helps keep your sperm healthy and your reproductive systems functioning as normal. For women, the cooler and more airy sleeping conditions can actually help prevent yeast infections. Yeast grows better in warm, moist conditions. When it’s cooler and dryer, the growth of yeast is prevented.
10. Sleeping in the summer is more bearable.Summertime is a tricky time to get good sleep. If you don’t have air conditioning, then you may find your bedroom a bit stuffy at night. Shedding those bedtime clothes can help the bedroom feel more comfortable. You may even be able to turn the A/C off on those cooler nights, which can save you a few bucks on your electricity bill. Don’t wake up drenched in sweat again because your thermostat is downstairs and the hot air expands up to your bedroom where the thermostat can’t read the warm temperatures.
With these tips in mind, it’s time to start taking off your clothes at night! Of course, there are times where clothes are preferable. If you are ill or it’s cold outside, then you should sleep with clothes on to help you stay warm and prevent further illness. Otherwise, go commando!
8 Reasons You Should Be Naked More Often
By: Kate Fridkis / April 9, 2012
Recently, I ended up naked in front of a full-length mirror. It was an accident. Seriously, it was. I don’t walk around naked that much. Anyway, there I was, naked, in front of this mirror. And for some reason, I took a long moment, just to look. And it was weird. Because it occurred to me that I never do that. Which I guess is actually pretty normal. But the weird part was that I didn’t really know my own naked body. It was vaguely familiar, of course. I mean, I do take showers and stuff. But I almost never pay attention to it, except to give it some unhelpful critique or be surprised by how chubby it’s gotten in certain places. Actually, ever since I gained some weight, I’ve wanted to be naked even less. Especially when there’s no immediate sex involved. Standing in front of the mirror, I had a small epiphany. I should get to know my naked body. I should get good at being naked. Actually, everyone should. If I was a dictator, I’d mandate daily naked time. And free healthcare for all! And cake! But mostly naked time. Why? Here are some reasons…
1. This is you. Under all those clothes, this the way you actually look. The rest is a disguise. Isn’t it weird not to know your own naked body? It’s kind of weird. Sometimes I feel like I’m mostly a brain, and then there’s this body attached. This body that inevitably looks disproportionate in photos. This body that decided to get abruptly curvy recently, but which had before been kind of bony. My body seems less a wonderland, as John Mayer might sing, and more a mysterious wilderness that occasionally sprouts a strangely placed hair like a flag, thus declaring its eternal independence. But no matter how separate from your body you feel, you are your body. And it is you. You’re this weird body/brain combination—like some hybrid alien creature– no, like a person. So you should get to know yourself. Naked.
2. It’s more fun. I have been known to feel a little awkward about being naked. Like, sometimes if someone else is around but for some reason I have to change, I do that squirmy-inside-the-clothes dance that usually results in either a new outfit or me falling on my face in the locker room at the gym. But how much more fun is life when you feel good about being naked? A lot, I’m willing to bet. Not that you have to whip everything off in front of some strangers, but it’s better not to have to worry about them seeing something unflattering. How much more fun is it to feel like your naked body is flattering? SO MUCH MORE FUN.
3. Sex. This is a big one. And it’s better when you like the way you look naked, when you know what you look like naked, and so it’s not shocking, and when you are comfortable being naked. Otherwise, it can be really, really awkward. It can be “please just turn off the light before I take this robe off” awkward. It can be “wait, do you have a flashlight so I can find my way back to my robe” afterwards awkward. I hope it’s never that awkward.. But sex can definitely get pretty un-amazing when you’re worried about your body. And your body definitely has to be (at least relatively) naked for sex. For amazing sex, body confidence is an absolute necessity. And I’m assuming we all want to have amazing sex? Right? OK, good.
4. Clothes. The better you feel naked, the better you’ll feel in clothes. Because clothes won’t just be about hiding things, they’ll be about celebrating things. I want my clothes to be a celebration. Is that asking too much of them? I think not!
5. Because it’s there. Like Everest. But a lot less dangerous and snowy. I mean, mine isn’t snowy. If yours is, that’s totally fine. Our bodies are challenging, though. They’re complicated and disobedient and sometimes they feel like they need to be tamed. Sometimes they are an obstacle that needs to be overcome. Climbed, if you will. Like Mount Everest. Or maybe they just need to be appreciated more. That’s what I really think. So a little less like Mount Everest and a little more like a puppy. It just needs attention! Give it love and attention and it will reward you with feelings of happiness and comfort. And sex appeal.
6. Your body “flaws” won’t be as shocking. I was shocked to notice that I have back fat. It must have crept up on me. The other day I was typing on my laptop in a towel, right after showering, and I leaned back in my chair and caught a glimpse of my back in the upright mirror by the table. Oh, the horror that awaited me there! Was that a ROLL? As in, a cinnamon roll or some other doughy pastry? On my back? Why, God, why? Because that’s what happens when you’re not really skinny and you have skin on your back, apparently. It would not have been so shocking if I typed in the (partial) nude more often. Or just knew my naked body better. Then I would’ve been like, “Yep. Back fat. It’s a fact.” That reminds me—I’m totally craving a cinnamon roll. Those things are good.
7. You’ll know your real sizes. My boobs are generally a lie. I’m wearing a padded bra all the time. When I’d just started dating my husband, I had this horrible realization that the first time he saw me without a bra, he might be … underwhelmed. Or downright offended. “False advertising!” He was fine, but it made me think about the dramatic difference between my clothed and naked boobs, and I wondered why I was afraid of having breasts that were, um, the actual size of my breasts. Why am I afraid of that? Maybe in part it’s because I’m so unused to it. The unknown is scary. But my boobs don’t have to be unknown. I just have to take off my bra, and there they are. Like magic.
8. You’ll feel more comfortable in general. If you can walk aroundyour apartment naked and happy, walking across a room in clothes is probably a piece of cake. If you can eat a piece of cake naked and happy (this might be my ultimate goal, in life), then you can definitely do anything. Liking yourself naked is liking yourself exposed, flawed, complicated, and undone. If you can like yourself like that, you can face the world proud and naked! Or just proud. With the confidence of a confident naked person.
So … do it! Stand naked in front of a mirror for a while. Do this more than once. Try walking around naked. Possibly eating cake. Have sex with the lights on, and take time to admire your own body in action. This is not totally self-absorbed, it’s healthy and good for everyone. You could even try naked yoga. I have not gone that far, but it doesn’t mean you can’t surpass me. Go ahead, I dare you, surpass me!
Kate Fridkis is a Brooklyn-based columnist, freelance writer, and bagel enthusiast who writes the blog Eat the Damn Cake. You can follow her on Twitter at @eatthedamncake.
Tags: body image, naked, nudity, top 10
Nudity Is Healthy for Brains and Bodies
Hank PellissierBy Hank Pellissier
Ethical Technology
Posted: Mar 14, 2012
Is clothing crushing us? Are we trapped in tomb-like textiles, exiling our flesh from experiencing the environment? Are we atrophying our epidermis, our senses, our neuro-intelligence?
If you put a plaster cast on a broken arm the skin starves for Vitamin D, the muscles weaken due to strangled range of motion, the nerve synapses depress to a whimper of their former joy. Twenty-first century hominids? We shroud our entire skin palette except for face, neck and hands - we obliterate symbiosis with the planet.
We hide in cocoons, when we could be free as butterflies.
History reveals many cultures that were not clothes-minded. Spartans were basically bare and their victories in pan-Hellenic sports competitions enticed all neighboring Greeks to exercise nude, creating the word “gymnasium” (Greek gymnos = naked). Romans mingled in magnificent bathhouses, enjoying dense communal nudity as they drank, dined, defecated, bathed, read books, argued politics, and watched theater. Adamists — naked heretics — performed stripped-down church services in North Africa, Bohemia, the Netherlands, and England. Pre-Hitler Germans were avid adherents ofFreikorperkultur (“Free Body Culture”) with 70,000 attending co-ed Nacktkultur schools.
There’s naked Japanese in hot springs, naked Finns in saunas, “sky-clad” Jain monks in India, plus millions of nudists worldwide going to “Nakation” camps, beaches, and resorts. They’re still sporty as Spartans, eager to hike naked (“free bush rambling”), canoe naked (“canuding”), bicycle naked, ride horses naked, run naked, play volleyball, badminton, ping-pong and chess naked, swim naked, dance naked, do Naked Yoga, Naked Tai Chi, Naked Gardening, Naked Bowling, and of course, many of us, perhaps you and I, dear readers, are NIFOC — Naked In Front of Computers.
Many famous figures were bare-all aficionados; too many politicians to name, so I’ll just list sci-fi and scientists: Leonard Nimoy, Alexander Graham Bell, Robert Heinlein, and seismologist Charles Richter. Nudism is prominent in Philip Jose Farmer’s Riverworld books and John Varley’s Steel Beach. Celebrities? Many movie stars skinny-dip at the French Riviera, trying to elude paparazzi seeking pix of Bruce WIllis’willy or Natalie Portman’s port side.
Here’s evidence suggesting that skin-only can be superior:
Born Free. Pediatricians agree that infants thrive with a daily dose of “naked time” because the unhampered range of motion aids brain development, stimulating neuron growth. Recent discoveries reveal that the “plastic” brain changes and develops throughout our entire lives. Neuroplasticity pioneer Michael M. Merzenich believes, “Everything that you can see happen in a young brain can happen in an older brain.” Doesn’t this imply that “naked time” is equally valuable for humans of any age, especially the elderly?
Weakened Bodies. A 2003 University of Reading study entitled “A Naked Ape Would Have Fewer Parasites” posits that “humans evolved hairlessness to reduce parasite loads, especially ectoparasites that may carry disease.” Unfortunately, the garments we wear can be a breeding ground for filthy fungi and bad bacterium, causing yeast infections, urinary tract infections, rotting toenails. Lyme Disease deer ticks can grab onto our sweaters and sea licecan sneak into our bathing suit crotches. Cinched-up belts, ties, and clothes impede breathing. Men’s snug pants raise testicle temperature, lowering sperm count and fertility.
Barefoot Medicine. Going shoeless is now recognized as an anti-Alzheimer’s, brain-boosting activity because the sole sensation entices your brain into growing extra, efficient neuron connections. Dr. Norman Doidge (author of The Brain That Changes Itself) believes skipping shoes increases brain flexibility and youthfulness, and many podiatrists now advise going barefoot as much as possible. Bare feet are today’s prescription. Will tomorrow’s elixir take the next step: Bare Body?
Superior Socialization. Self-actualization proponent Abraham Maslow believed “Nudism… is itself a kind of therapy.” Health benefits of social nudity include stress reduction, satiation of curiosity about the human body, reduction of porn addiction, a sense of full-body integration and developing a wholesome attitude about the opposite gender. Research at the University of Northern Iowa discovered that nudists have significantly higher body self-acceptance. Another study concluded that teens at a New York nudist camp were “extraordinarily well-adjusted, happy, and thoughtful.” It’s also excellent for children to grow up free of shame about the human body.
Tolerant Views.A University of Central Florida 2008 study of 384 participants concluded that pro-nudity students “were significantly more accepting of other religious groups and gays and lesbians” when compared to the anti-nudity students. They were also “less prejudiced towards ethnically dissimilar others.”
Soothe Away Your Crazies. Massage is recognized as a therapeutic treatment for mental health issues like depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, bipolarism, borderline personality disorder, learning difficulties, and low self-esteem. The skin stimulation of massage — improving blood flow and detoxifying the lymph system — is duplicated by the warmth, freedom, and improved circulation generated in nakedness.
Soak Up The Rays Vitamin D deficiency is currently soaring, with up to 75% of USA teens and adults receiving insufficient amounts of the “sunshine vitamin.” Lack of this essential health aid is a factor in numerous ailments, including cancer, heart disease, osteoporosis and diabetes. Anyone who bares all outside as a “naturist” harvests larger amounts of Vitamin D in a quicker time span.
Financial Liberation. Clothes are a huge money and time-suck with shopping, laundry, closets, dressers, and gazillions of hours wasted wondering what so-and-so looks like with their garments removed. The global markets for swimsuits alone is expected to reach $17.6 billion annually by 2015; our carbon footprint would shrink like a wool sweater if fabric was no longer manufactured.
Longevity (just joking!). Have you noticed that the furry Norway Rat only lives 2-3 years, while the Naked Mole Rat survives to be 28?
So… is the future going to be full frontal? Will the post-Singularity planet be stripped? Will everyone in a climate-controlled tomorrow choose to be nude, strutting around like the Nuba dancers and boxers of Leni Reifenstahl?
Trends point to an era where there won’t be a stitch to worry about. Many resort areas are are now offering nudism to increase tourism, and American naturist clubs claim their enrollment is growing 20% annually. The German airline OssiUrlaub.de offered nude chartered flights to a Baltic sea resort, and today’s lengthy luggage searches at airports are steering travelers to destinations where they only need carry-on towels and sunblock. Twenty million Europeans already go to nude beaches and spas.
Getting goosebumps imagining it, are you?
A REAL PLEASURE
The relationship between health and sexual competence
Sexual and reproductive health
Sexual Health & Improving Sexual Relationships
Guidelines for Female Pleasure, Eroticism, and Orgasm
20 ways to empower the woman (and her partner) to value female desire
Post published by Barry W McCarthy Ph.D. on Jan 15, 2013 in What's Your Sexual Style?
There is more written about orgasm than any other area of female sexuality. The good news is that awareness of the woman's "sexual voice" which includes desire, pleasure, eroticism, and satisfaction is healthy for the woman, the couple, and the culture. The bad news is that sexual performance demands, specifically viewing orgasm as a pass-fail test, increases self -consciousness and reduces sexual desire.
The following guidelines empower the woman (and her partner) to value female desire and satisfaction. Orgasm is integral to the pleasuring/eroticism process. This approach confronts the performance pressure of orgasm as the pass-fail sex test.
1. A female is responsible for her desire, pleasure, eroticism, and orgasm. Developing a unique sexual voice is a woman's challenge. It is not the man's responsibility to "give her an orgasm".
2. Together you develop an intimate, interactive couple sexual style which facilitates desire, pleasure, eroticism, orgasm, and satisfaction.
3. Receptivity and responsivity to pleasurable and erotic touch facilitates arousal and orgasm.
4. Arousal involves both subjective components (feeling sexy and turned-on) and objective components (vaginal lubrication and being physically receptive to intercourse).
5. "Foreplay"-where the man stimulates the woman to get her ready for intercourse-increases self-consciousness and performance anxiety. The experience of "pleasuring"- which emphasizes mutuality and sharing-facilitates desire and orgasm.
6. Pleasuring and eroticism often lead to intercourse, but intercourse is not the test of sexuality nor is intercourse necessary for a satisfying sexual experience. A key concept is to transition to intercourse at high levels of erotic flow.
7. You can develop your unique "sexual voice"-being aware of what facilitates and what subverts healthy sexuality. Take an active role in verbally and non-verbally making requests and guiding your partner.
8. The prescription for satisfying sexuality is intimacy, pleasuring, and eroticism. Traditionally, female sexual socialization has underplayed eroticism. Eroticism is integral to orgasm and satisfaction.
9. Be aware of your preferences-pleasure-recipient vs. mutual stimulation; focused vs. multiple stimulation; when and how to transition from sensual to erotic stimulation; emotional and physical conditions for a vital and satisfying couple sexuality.
10. You cannot say "yes" to healthy sexuality unless you have the right to say "no" to sex. You are free to initiate the transition from pleasuring to intercourse and to guide intromission.
11. Women who prefer multiple stimulation during pleasuring/eroticism usually prefer multiple stimulation during intercourse. You can utilize clitoral stimulation with his or your fingers, request breast or buttock stimulation, enjoy erotic fantasies, and/or switch intercourse positions.
12. Many women hope to use pro-sexual medications when they become available to enhance sexual desire and orgasm. Medication can be a valuable resource, but it is not a stand-alone "magic pill". The pro-sex medication needs to be integrated into your couple sexual style of intimacy, pleasure, and eroticism.
13. Many women, especially after 40, use some form of additional lubrication (usually estrogen or water-based). This facilitates intercourse, but is not a substitute for subjective arousal.
14. Only 1 in 4 women experience the male pattern of one orgasm during intercourse without using additional stimulation. Female sexual response and orgasm is more flexible, variable, and individualistic than male sexual response. You may be non-orgasmic, singly orgasmic, or multi-orgasmic which might occur during pleasuring, intercourse, or afterplay, depending on your unique pattern and preferences. Female sexual response is more variable and flexible-different, not better or worse-than male sexual response.
15. Develop comfort with your desire, pleasure, eroticism, orgasm pattern. Sexuality is about experiencing and sharing pleasure, it is not a performance to have a "G" spot orgasm, multiple orgasms, a "vaginal" orgasm, extended orgasm, or whatever is the new performance fad.
16. Orgasm is a three to ten second experience. Orgasm is a natural result of subjective arousal, erotic flow, and giving yourself permission to enjoy the orgasmic experience.
17. The distinction between "clitoral" and "vaginal" orgasm is not scientifically valid. Whether orgasm occurs with manual, oral, rubbing, intercourse, self, or vibrator stimulation, the physiological response is very similar although the subjective experience of satisfaction varies depending on expectations and preferences.
18. It is unrealistic to expect orgasm during each sexual experience; you are not a sexual machine. Female sexuality is more variable and flexible than male sexuality. On average, women are orgasmic during 70 per cent of sexual encounters. Satisfaction involves orgasm, but is much more than orgasm.
19. Orgasm is integral to female sexuality. Desire and satisfaction are more important than orgasm. You are free to make requests of your partner (prolonged pleasuring, your pace of arousal, multiple stimulation, preferred erotic scenarios, vibrator stimulation, cunnilingus to orgasm, clitoral stimulation during intercourse) to enhance pleasure, eroticism, and orgasm.
20. Remember, sexuality is not about proving anything to yourself, your partner, or anyone else. Sexuality is about sharing desire, pleasure, eroticism, orgasm, and satisfaction.
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